Happy New Year!

Happy 2011! Here's wishing everyone a safe, prosperous, healthy new year. Here's the 2010 edition of our Christmas video. Hope you enjoy!

Christmas Eve Visitors

Once again, our noisy neighbors are makin' a ruckus. Of course, the boys didn't help the matter any. This is what we do for entertainment over here in lower, slower, Delaware! It's how we roll, dog! Merry Christmas!

A Christmas Story

'Twas the week before Christmas, when the family came to visit.
For laughter, joy, and cheer. And cornbread most exquisite.
I sat in the recliner, with Ma on my lap.
To spend time with family, and all that good crap.
Great stories were a plenty, the laughs all grew louder.
We all gorged ourselves on habanero corn chowder.
When we all finished eating all the grub we could bear
That's when we realized, the Pleffner's weren't there.
But where could they be? What could cause such a fuss?
But then we all thought "Hey, more cheesecake for us!"
But alas they arrived, and our gifts we exchanged.
Then Tom proposed something that sounded quite strange.
A Yankee gift exchange, what fun!
When it's O.K. to be selfish.
You don't like your present? Just take someone else's!
Candles for Pop Pop? Pringles for Zack?
Andy stole my beef jerky. But I soon stole it back.
Spongebob on golf balls. "Chalk, chalk, chalk" someone chants.
And what happens in the pants, stays in the pants.
But with our bellies all full, and our gifts all in hand.
It was time to draw a close to this party so grand.
What a great time we had. So sad to see it end.
But next Christmas we'll do it all over again.
And I heard Karen say, as we drove off in our truck.
"Thank God they're all gone! Now who the hell's cleaning up?"



Merry Christmas, Y'all!

Did Somebody Call For a Doctor?

We Won!

Just got word that the video Coach Fred submitted in the Atari contest WON!! I'm not sure of everything that happens now, but I do know that the Cape organization gets their uniforms and equipment paid for next season! Thank you to everyone who voted. I've included a link so you can watch the video.


http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3Dm_tKaCnkztQ&h=ce1b7

Football Pictures

Just thought I would share the boys' football pictures. We just got them today. I know it appears that they're both constipated, but they're not. Football players don't smile for pictures! These pictures were taken right before the Dover game. No smiling allowed. Focus, focus, focus. One errant smile, and who knows what could happen! Merry Christmas!

E-mail to Santa

I sent an e-mail to Santa today for Aaron and he sent back a video. The link is below. Check it out!

http://www.portablenorthpole.tv/watch/guest/EKsu37di5hCpuXw3G9q2jg

Hey Kids! What Time Is It?

It's that time of year again! Matthew is once again selling gift tags for Christmas! He's offering the same designs from last year as well as two new designs. The small tags come thirty to a sheet and the large tags come ten to a sheet. And, once again, he will customize the "to" and "from" lines. Customized, printed, and mailed to your house, all for just $1.75/ sheet! But wait, there's more! Order five sheets, and the sixth sheet is FREE! Order yours today!

Update!

I had to show you this one. Now he's got a nice shiner! This injury keeps getting worse before it gets better. I bet he'll think twice before he dances in the living room again! (probably not)

Ouch!

Coffee table 1, Aaron 0.

Backyard Sports

Backyard Sports

Please take a minute and vote for Collin and Matthew's team to be the Backyard Sports sponsored team for 2011. Coach Fred made the video and it's good. It's entry #1. You can vote once a day. Thanks for your help!

Rock Star Ravioli

Does everyone remember last year, about this time, Collin had a school project where he had to promote a product as a replacement of turkey for Thanksgiving? He called it "Halftime Ham". Well, it's Matthew's turn. Introducing "Rockstar Ravioli!" Rock on Dudes!

Great Season

Well, as they say, "It's all over but the cryin' " The Cape Vikings fought a tough battle, but in the end, came up short and lost 13-7. Needless to say, the boys are heartbroken. They really worked hard for this. This will go down as one of those life lessons learned the hard way. Definitely a character builder. It was a great game though. A dog fight all the way. But our boys were in it till the last snap. Never gave up. Never stopped fighting. Overall, it was a great season. A final record (including playoffs) of 7-3. Every football season is such a grind, but in the end, it's worth it. The lessons the boys take away from these games are something that can't be taught. The work ethic that's instilled and the courage to face adversity head on is something they will carry with them forever. Win or lose, we are super proud of them. Great job, men!

In The Books!

Round two of the playoffs, here we come. Cape smacked Dover today 33-7. Great job boys!Next week at Smyrna. Lots of game prep this coming week, including adding some new plays to the arsenal. It's on!

Happy Halloween!

Just thought I would share some pics of Aaron in his Halloween costume. He marched in his pre-school's parade today.

Football Heroes

When we last saw our football superheroes (Collin and Matthew), they were on top of the world, fresh off a beat down in week one of Lower Sussex 33-0. What a game. The following game in week two? ehh... not so much. More on that in a bit. We now rejoin the wonder twits, seven games later. Bruises? Yup. Ego? In-check. Self-confidence? Through the roof. Season record? 6 and 2. For the sports novices in the crowd, and you know who you are, that's six wins and two losses. That's also a third seed in the playoffs that start Saturday! We play Dover who we played three weeks ago and beat 32 to 12. If we win this game, it's off to Smyrna next week. If we beat them, we play for the championship at Salisbury State University. Most likely we will face Woodbridge in that game. They are the team that brought our high flying heroes swiftly down to earth in week two. They are a very good team. They are also dirty and nasty. I won't go into details, but our team was not prepared for what they saw and heard in that game. And wouldn't you know it, the refs that Woodbridge hired to officiate the game, didn't see or hear a thing. Hmm. Strange. Rest assured, our Vikings are looking for some redemption. (and to open up a big ol' can of woop ass) Also, the refs for the playoffs are hand picked by the league. No home town, good ol' boys officiating for there home town team.

But first things first. Dover. We play Saturday at eleven. Tune in next week for all the bone crunching details! Same brat time, same brat channel!

Update!

Cape Vikings 33. Lower Sussex Indians 0. Nuff said. Great job boys!

Where have you been?

Hello? Anybody here? Alright, I know. Four months is a long time in between posts. Busy time of year. Since I last posted, the boys' baseball season ended. My rookie season of managing went pretty well, I think. We went 8-4 and finished second in the league. Not too bad, I guess. Collin's team also finished second. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride! Oh well. We'll get'em next year. Being a lifelong Redskin fan (and possibly a fool) I can say that every year and actually mean it down deep in my soul! But onward and upward. Football season is in full swing. I'm once again assistant coaching Collin and Matthew's team. Matthew is starting right guard and Collin is starting QB. Our first real game is this Saturday. Let the madness begin! I'll let you know how it goes. Aaron is growing like a weed. He starts preschool in two weeks. I can't believe he's four already. Time's a flyin'. I think he's going to be even more stubborn than Collin, and that's no small feet. (small feet, get it?!) oh well. He's still into the whole "cop" thing. Although now his allergies are in high gear, so the skull crackin' and the body slammin' have to be done with one hand. The other hand is always holding a tissue! Not the manliest cop I've ever seen, but whatever. Oh yeah. We're now a three cat family. Look for us on an episode of "Pet Hoarders" soon. I'll spare you all the details and choices we faced, but basically: July fourth weekend, stray cat, three boys, yada,yada,yada. We now have three cats. Lame story I know, but writing about the whole saga is about as exciting as paint drying. Anyway, that's all for now. I'm not even going to say "I'll try to post more often" I'm setting the bar low these days as far as the blog is concerned. Look at it this way. If I'm too busy to post, then things are going good and I've got work and other things to keep me busy. If I start posting every day, that means no work and clear out your basement. The Mattia's are coming to a town near you! Let's pray you don't hear from me for months!

Dip, Anyone?

Well, we opened the pool today. Yikes, what a mess. I don't know if the heavy rain and snow we got this past year did it or what, but this is the worst I have ever seen it. I'd like to report that the water is green. That would be a good thing at this point. But when we pulled the cover off, the water was actually black. I was excited when I first saw it. I thought I struck some bubblin' crude. Oil that is. Black gold. Texas tea.... I bet you knew I was going to do that. Unfortunately, upon closer examination, I just struck crud. Not crude. It was at that point that I had to make the decision to either start cleaning it or stock it with bass and break out the tackle box. After careful consideration, I opted to start cleaning. Actually, all I did was start the filter and dump in enough chemicals to kill all life forms within a 10 mile radius. Only the roaches will survive. Well at least they'll have a clean pool to swim in.

Sleep Deprevation

Here it is. Just before 9 p.m. on Saturday night. My eyelids feel like they have weights on them. I am really tired. Why you ask? Well even if you didn't ask, I'll tell you anyway. This morning was football sign-ups! But of course, if you want one of the coveted 35 spots on a team, you have to get there early. And when I say early, I mean 9 p.m. the night before. If you wait until sometime Saturday morning to get in line, you're out of luck. The wait outside was pretty brutal. It got cold and windy. This year I took a grill and tailgated. Then a bunch of us huddled around the "campfire" and shot the bull all night. Then, to make matters worse, the doors opened 30 minutes late. After we waited in the cold for 11 hours, they couldn't manage to get the doors open on time. They managed to get the concession stand opened by 6 a.m. sharp. But the actual sign-ups, inside where the heat is? Couldn't pull it off. They almost had a riot on their hands. So anyway, that's why I'm so tired. I've been up for going on 38 hours straight. (with the exception of a brief nap when I got home this morning after signing the boys up. Then what does my dumb a** do? I cut the grass. Brilliant, I know. Then I manage to find other things to keep me busy, right up until now. But do I go to bed? Nooo. I write on the blog! I'm a real genius. Well, now I'm so tired, I'm getting cranky with myself. Probably time to go. I've got to get up early and weed-whack!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Alright, I have to tell this story. Linda will probably kill me when she reads it, but whatever.

Now I can say this about Linda. She runs a tight ship. Sun up till sun down, she's on the ball. And our home and our family is better for it. June Cleaver on steroids, if you will. (minus the pearls.) Now with that drill sergeant mentality, it's only natural that she demands a little respect, from not only me, but especially from the boys. Lord help you if you dis' June. It's on. Not even Ward can save you then. Which brings me to my story.

Yesterday, we still had family visiting for Easter. So in the morning, there was our three boys as well as their cousins Kristopher and Cara. All the kids decided they wanted to go outside. Nice day for it. One problem. Our boys know the rules. If Aaron wants to go out, you have to be the big brothers and take him with you. Well they decided to just grab their shoes and go. Linda started calling them. "Boys! Boys!" she called.... Nothing. She proceeded to put Aaron's shoes on, growing more frustrated by the minute. You have to understand one thing. Three days with Collin, Matthew, Aaron, and Kristopher in the same house, and something's gonna give. And it gave. Linda took Aaron outside and found the boys playing under one of our trees in the front yard. She also found our neighbor outside of her house working on her yard. No matter. I guess she thought if they hadn't moved by now, then they must be used to it. So once again she called, only a little louder this time. They were all the way across the yard, after all. "BOYS!!!" ...Nothing. So a little louder. BOYYYSSS!!! ....Again, nothing. Now they've done it. They've awoke the sleeping giant. David Banner is about to go green on their little butts. She bellows in a Hulk Hogan-esk voice. ( "The Hulk-a-maniacs are gonna get ya, brother!!") BOYYYSSS!!!, she yells. Finally, they look up at her. Then she let's it fly. "When I call "boys" , if you've got a penis, you better answer me!" Well, that got their attention. And the neighbor's as well. Little boys hate when you refer to "that" in public. It's like kryptonite is to Superman. Anyway, they decided to not only answer her, but to come to where she was standing and find out what she wants. Mission accomplished. Order restored. Respect earned. End of story.

So if you're wondering how a seemingly timid woman consistently defeats attempts at anarchy in a house full of males, there you have it. Oh, she just called me. If I want to keep mine, I better go see what Colonel Cleaver wants. I hope it's not those pearls.

Here We Go Again? Maybe Not.

I felt I had to comment on the recent HUGE trade that has made Donovan McNabb a Redskin. While my initial reaction , after hearing about it late last night, was here we go again. Another big name veteran, arguably beyond his prime, signed by the Skins. ( see "To Hail with the Redskins", November 5, 2009. ) But after stewing on it all day, I have to say, I'm warming up to it a bit. It was a decision made by Bruce Allen and Mike Shanahan. Not Vinnie Cerrato and Dan Snyder. Football guys making a calculated football decision. They want to win now. Not in three years. NOW. Donovan McNabb brings that to the table. I think. One thing's for sure. He's definitely a step up from J.C. Now the question is, can we protect him and give him time to be the play maker? That's where the draft comes into play. The Redskins need to draft Russell ( I can't spell or pronounce his last name ) from Oklahoma. A BIG left tackle that would immediately fill a BIG void in the O-line. That combined with a now deep running back trio (Portis, Johnson, and Parker) could make for an interesting season. But I think above all, the one thing that encourages me the most about this team is this. The first offer the Skins put on the table was Albert Haynesworth straight up for Donovan. What that tells me is the new smarter management of this team recognizes that the $100 million dollar Haynesworth deal made last off season by Vinnie Ceratto was foolish. They tried to off load that noose around their neck the first chance they got. The Eagles, wisely, turned that offer down. So even if we're still stuck with Haynesworth, we now have a future Hall of Fame quarterback leading our offense. Not a bad position to be in. I think we still need to pick up a quarterback later in the draft to train under McNabb, but I think Allen and Shanahan have put the Skins in the best position to win games this year. And that's what it's all about. I'm ready to be a proud Redskins fan again.

Grass Cutting

Whew! Just got done mowing the grass for the first time this year. Now let's see. At least once a week, four weeks a month, seven months. Hey, only 112 more cuttings and I'm done for the season. At two hours total each cut, I spend approximately 226 hours every season cutting grass. That's almost ten 24 hour days dedicated to my lawn! That doesn't include the fertilizing, flower beds, yada, yada, yada. I don't think I spend that much time with my kids. Or my wife, for that matter. I should legally adopt my lawn so I can claim it on my taxes, just like the kids. Actually, now that I'm sitting here thinking about it, I'm beginning to like my lawn more than my kids. My lawn doesn't back talk. It doesn't fight me to eat a meal. No poopy pants, boogers on the wall, or any other bodily fluid mishaps. (Clean up in isle seven!) In the winter, it leaves you alone for months. My lawn didn't once say this past winter, "Dad, I'm bored!" And, if you don't like the way your lawn is turning out, just plow it under and start over. Try doing that with your kids. "Uh, son. We don't like the way your turning out, so to make a long story short, your mother's pregnant and your out." That's why we had Aaron. We screwed up the first two so bad, we figured the third time's the charm! Although I have to say my lawn doesn't always do as I say. "I don't like the looks of that crabgrass next door. You stay away from him. He's nothing but trouble." But it invites crabgrass over anyway. Then I have to be the bad guy and send his new friend packing. Hey, that's another advantage of a lawn over a kid. You don't like his new friend he brought home, you kill him! No discussions. No arguments. Just Round-up. Problem solved. Wow, don't ask me where this pile of rambling crap came from. Maybe Mom took too many happy pills when she was pregnant with me. After all, the third time's the charm. The first two are obviously screwed up! Just kidding. Just kidding. I should probably stop now. Later.

Dinner, Anyone?

Anyone interested in a dinner for five? Menu is undetermined. Probably chicken or beef. You'll be seated in a quaint little dining room along with 2,000 or so other guests. Oh yeah, did I mention it's in Philadelphia, so it's two plus hours away? All this for the incredible price of $270.00! Alright. The truth. The only thing incredible about this deal is how incredibly stupid Pop Warner Football must think we are. That's right. For us to attend Collin's Scholastic All-American Banquet, just the dinner will cost $270.00! Here's the breakdown. $40.00 per plate per kid (including Aaron. He's such a big eater at three years old.) and $75.00/ea. for Linda and I. Are they freakin' kidding?! They must be crazy if they think I'll pay that. The way this whole thing is supposed to work is the awards ceremony is on Friday night and the banquet is on Saturday night. So if we were to go, we would also require a hotel room. Which brings me to my next gripe. Their website says that the Marriott, which is actually attached to the convention center where this is being held, is offering "special" rates for attendees. $149.00/night! I checked out Expedia and found the Hilton (that's the Hilton, mind you) directly across the street for $94.00/night. That's special alright. But wait. It gets better. For everyone to attend the awards ceremony on Friday, we have to pay $5.00/person for that! (Although Collin gets in to that for free.) Oh, and don't forget the Pop Warner jerseys you can buy for only $49.00! So, needless to say, we will not be attending the banquet. Although we will attend the awards ceremony on Friday and drive back home that night. Me thinks something stinks around here, and this time, it ain't me. I think Profit Warner... Oops. sorry. I mean Pop Warner, has lost their way. (or their minds) just a tad. So let's do some simple math and summarize, shall we? Award ceremony - $20.00. Hotel - $149.00. Banquet - $270.00. The satisfaction of teaching our son that there will come times in your life when you have to stand up for what is right, even though it may not be popular, and say "No".... Priceless.

Science Fair Update!!

The Cape Henlopen School District 5th Grade Science Fair was tonight. Collin's "Spud or Dud" project, based on the potato cannon, won fourth place in the "Physical Science" category! Who says blowing up stuff isn't educational?

UPDATE! UPDATE!

A few posts back, I mentioned how Collin was nominated for Scholastic All-American. That puts him in the top one percent of all Pop Warner players nationwide. He would either be chosen 1st team, second team, or honorable mention prior to going to the national banquet in Philthy-delphia in May. We were told that the decisions on who made what teams would not be made public until April 1st, but they came out today. Collin made 2nd team! I put a link to the PopWarner web site page that has his name in it. We are super proud of him! Anyway, that's all for now. We'll keep you updated.

http://www.popwarner.com/scholastics/2010scholars/5thGradeFootball10.htm

Dancin' Fool

In a previous post, I mentioned how Aaron loves dancing to the "Cops" theme. Well, I finally got it on video. We really need to find him a hobby.



P.S. If you want to see something really funny, after the video has played, grab the little doohickey (technical term, you wouldn't understand) and back it up to the beginning of the video. The still shot that it shows is better than the whole video. He reminds me of Lucky the Leprechaun!

You Want Fries With That?

Hey Guys. Check out our new potato cannon. We made it as part of Collin's science fair project. The burning question he's going to answer is "Which type of potato flies farther when shot from a potato gun; russet, sweet, or white?" The first video yielded no conclusive facts. Truthfully, I think our cannon needed some Viagra. It's hard to tell on such a small screen, but the potato flies out of the barrel and goes a whopping 3 feet. Hence the laughter you hear. We made some minor adjustments and in no time, we had spuds a flyin'! The second video shows the potato flying across our yard into our neighbor's yard. At the end of the day, the white potato flew farthest with an average distance of 361 feet. We'll let you know how he does in the science fair. The longest shot we got off was a killer 396 feet! That one actually went past our yard, past our next door neighbor's yard, and landed in the neighbor's yard two houses down! That one sent the boys running. When we were done, we took the left over potatoes and shot them in the opposite direction into the pond behind our other neighbor's house. We're expecting the strongly worded, well organized list of grievances to arrive any day now from the homeowners association. "You might be a redneck if your homeowners association files a complaint against you about firing your potato cannon!" There goes the property values.

P.S. Thank you Karen for the book on how to build the cannon! You should take pride in the fact that you contributed to my children's delinquency.

Bad Boys

Hey all. Just thought I would write a bit and let you in on all the excitement at the Mattia house. Well, not really, but here goes. Aaron has taken a strange liking to the show "Cops". As I write this, we're watching an episode. Lucky for him, it's on TruTv every night. He runs through the house with his handcuffs and his gun (or his shoot gun as he calls it) shouting "GET ON THE GROUND!, GET ON THE GROUND!" Don't even get me started on how funny it is to see him dancing and singing when the "Bad Boys" theme song comes on! That's a video I've got to get. I've spent many a night handcuffed, stuffed behind the recliner (that's jail) waiting to make bail. And now since American Idol has started, and we all saw the audition with the man singing "Pants on the Ground", we run around shouting "PANTS ON THE GROUND!, PANTS ON THE GROUND!" It's a little disturbing. Anyway, baseball has officially started. I'm managing Matthew's team. Try-outs are tomorrow and Sunday. Then we have the draft. It should be great. The pressure is on though. Matthew's team, the Indians, are the minor league champs two years running. Now the team is mine. Yikes. Wish me luck. Collin's team, the Braves, should be pretty good this year. They have a lot of talent (including Collin!) coming back this year as well as some good players moving up from the minors. It should be a good time. Work is picking up. We've ventured into new territory. We built our first entertainment center. I've included a picture of it. It's all from scratch. I even made the raised panel doors myself. Our customer is very happy with it, and it was profitable, so what's not to like? What we would like to do next is make wood patio furniture. I know it sounds crazy, but it could be good. We're still checking it out. I'll keep you posted. Well, that's all for now. I just made bail. Thank God. Bubba started singing "Pants on the Ground!" Talk to you soon.

We're Still Here

First, let me say, I know this is the first post since like Christmas, or something. Hey, get over it. Honestly, it's been quiet here. Nothing really to talk about. Unless you consider cutting firewood or suffering from dry winter skin itch, interesting topics. Yup, we live in the fast lane here. On the cutting edge, baby! We did survive the "Blizzard of 2010". We lost electric from about 1:00 a.m. to 8:00 a.m. Saturday. Luckily, we had the fireplace going and plenty of wood stockpiled, so we were good to go. This is the boys' first big snowstorm. They were diggin' it. Literally. They lasted about an hour into the big Sunday dig-out when the urge to assault each other with snow took over. That was all she wrote. I flew solo for the next 5 hours shoveling while they were in search of the biggest drift to bury themselves in. I managed to get a little over half way down the driveway when my neighbor from two houses down showed up with his industrial size snow blower. Thank you Ron! The first half took me six hours. The second half, 15 minutes! He is a Wilmington firefighter and was on duty during last weekend's storm. His wife was by herself stuck in the house, so after I plowed our driveway, I plowed them out. My tractor and plow didn't have a prayer against this storm, though. The snow in some spots was actually taller than the tractor itself! Anyway, enough of that. We all have our snow shovels to bare. On a different topic, Collin and Matthew both made honor roll again this marking period. Collin originally had a "D" in social studies, which would obviously take him out of the running for honor roll. The only problem was we didn't receive any notes or e-mails or calls from his teacher. He got an "A" in this class last marking period. We couldn't understand how this could happen, and with no courtesy call from his teacher. They both bring home "Thursday Notes" which sums up that week in school. If you bring home home a note marked "good", then no problems. If you bring home an "unsatisfactory" note, that means you got a bad grade on a test or didn't turn in an assignment or something. We received no "bad" Thursday notes or anything. Our first clue something was going on was when he brought home his report card. Well, needless to say, this did not sit well with us. I called his teacher the following day and asked her what was going on. She said Collin didn't turn in a report (that we knew he turned in because we helped him with it) and two Weekly Readers. So he received zeros for those three assignments. Her original answer was that she should have notified us sooner of his issues, but that she'll definitely do better at communicating this marking period. But the grade stays. No,no,no,no,no. I don't think so. Anyway, to make a excruciatingly long story a little less long, a call to the principal and a face to face with his teacher Friday morning and viola! Honor roll assembly Friday afternoon. The truth was he turned in the report and they lost it and he didn't put his name on the two weekly readers. Stupid on his part, yes. But worthy of zeros? No. We already told Collin that next time he gets marked down for forgetting his name, he owns it. Not only that, but we expect "A" honor roll this marking period. No excuses. Well anyway, that's all for now. I've bloviated enough. (I learned that word from Bill O'Reilly!) Talk to you soon.